Friday, June 12, 2009

Gayzies Crazies

Sometimes I wonder if this gayness comes with a certain amount of mental instability. For instance, as I watch Gabrielle Solis get thrown under the bus for sleeping with a high school boy on Desperate Housewives, I have to admit that sleeping with a high school boy is actually a lofty goal of mine. And as I watch three college girls on 20/20 cry about gangrape, I recall that as a child I always dreamed of getting raped by 10 guys from a community college baseball team.

And I have to wonder if normal people think about these things the same way I do. Is there some reason that instead of viewing these acts with disgust I kinda sorta maybe wish they would happen to me? Do I only think this way because I am a sex-crazed predatory gay fixated on only two things: hot ass and designer eyewear?

At any rate, I'm a little worried about myself. I am flirting with the notion of preemptively registering on the list of sex offenders. But you know, only to meet other cute sex offenders.

Why can't my sexual thoughts be wholesome, just like those of boring straight people.

6 comments:

Drew said...

Haha!

Damn those are two of my fantasies/goals as well.

I think that our acceptance of the taboo (being gay) is a step towards acceptance of the sketchier elements of sexuality, at least as viewed by the mainstream straight community.

Anonymous said...

you are not the only one on this...

D. said...

yeah you're totally not the only one. XD

Anonymous said...

I think you unwitting invented a new tagline for every poor soul who writes a blog:

"I am a sex-crazed predatory gay fixated on only two things: hot ass and designer eyewear"

well done - not sure about the community college basketball team, maybe NCAA Division 1 though

Anonymous Blogger said...

LOL I think you spoke on behalf of a lot of people.

Mike said...

I love this and totally empathize.