Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Red is the New Dead

Yes, I am fine, I was not killed by the metro. Thanks for asking. Oh wait, nobody asked. Thanks for that.

Right now, every single person I know has their Facebook status as, "OMG I was on the metro!" Ok, you were going from NIH to Shady Grove in the other side of the city going the opposite direction. Don't be dramatic.

That's my job.

In my sophomore year of high school, I was right behind the other train that crashed on the red line. And I missed the earlier train because I bought a burrito right before boarding. So while I was stuck underground for 2 hours, I thanked that burrito and then ate it. Possible death and definite low blood sugar: averted. Chipotle solves everything.

Monday, I left Georgetown at 4:30 and transferred at Metro Center a little before 5:00. And I was fucking pissed I just missed the earlier train because clueless tourists with their fold-a-million-times maps always get in the way at Metro Center. But if I caught it, I might be dead! This deserves an exclamation point. Because I have cheated death twice.

Just kidding. There's no way I could have died in either of these situations. I always sit in the middle of the train (where people don't even know they've been in an accident). Also, I like to wedge myself between to impossibly obese people whose fat can absorb all the force of the impact.

But what this tells me is that the metro has designs for my life. And perhaps the third time will be the charm.

But right now, I am fine. Thanks for worrying. Oh wait, you weren't worried. Thanks for that.


Aek said...

Well I'm glad your okay. :)

David said...

i actually thought about checking in on you but then i saw that you had a new entry with that title and realized you were fine and dandy.

i agree - chipotle does solve all of life's problems.

x! said...

There was no need to ask. You twittered "Jon and Kate Plus 8 Tonight!!" that day.

:) Glad you are alive.

Tristan said...

Strangely enough, the first thing I did when I heard was check your blog... You're the only person living in DC I have any connection with, and I saw the twitter entry. So panic over.

Oldyeller said...

I dint even know you took the red line or the metro for that matter, so I was blissfully unaware. I take the red line every morning & evening, but don't go where the accident was. But I continue to face certain death by sitting in the last car. When the last serious accident happened in 2005, I was in the same station at the same time, but on the other track. Big deal.

Random Thinker said...

anyone who's ever ridden the metro knows to sit near the middle.

i'm actually amazed that during the time you were stranded in the dark for 2 hours, why the metro police didn't come and arrest you for eating on the train. that's punishable by solitary confinement in a superMax prison!

you not only cheated death, you cheated justice!

mstpbound said...

hey at least you don't love the train, right? because a la frozen flower, then it'd try to cut ur balls off ;d