Saturday, November 8, 2008

Vote or Die

So I didn't vote. And I have my reasons! Tuesday is my heavy day! I had an orgo exam on Thursday! My voting station is far away! My internet was being weird!

But this one person freaked out when she found out I didn't vote. First, she held her mouth agape, revealing her ugly interior-mouth. Then she spoke, revealing her ugly interior-brain. "YOU DIDN'T VOTE?! What's wrong with you? It's your responsibility! You are giving up your power! You are destroying the Amazon!" And what the walking public service announcement is really saying is, "Why didn't you vote (for Obama)? Don't you want change? Don't you want to fit in? Don't you want a new puppy in the White House?"

What's with this charade? I know I should have voted, but this was an election that wasn't close. And let's get real, you voted because you wanted a free button and the moral high ground. Just because you voted doesn't mean you did what was right. Get off your high horse so I can punch the back of your head. Please don't use my apathy against me, I worked very hard to perfect it. And I refuse to take part in the freakish cult following that is American society.


I can't stand people who think they're better than me because they conformed to MTV's expectations of them. And they use their supposed superiority to make me feel bad. But they assume I care about anything other than myself. Which is incorrect.


But if Obama had just told me from the beginning that America would get a puppy if he won, I definitely would've voted.

6 comments:

Less Confused said...

I was told that he was giving out free checks....and I still didn't vote for him.

Don't feel bad, it may be your right, but you also have a right to execute that right or not.

I considered not voting because I was tired of being a part of insane situation, but I had the time, so I did, but you're not less of an american for not.

Seriously...we're getting a new puppy?

Aek said...

Oh well, I wish you had voted too (I don't care for who). But, it's well within your right not to vote. And I'm okay with that as long as you're okay with that. :P

Lol, my word verification here is "excess."

dickophile said...

can we go back to the fun posts? not that this one wasnt amusing but i miss the sexually frustrated, socially awkward j. i come here to escape all this current event bullshit.

anna said...

I didn't know you have or choice of voting or not in America :O

im from Australia

Toby said...

Ironically, you didn't vote because you think you're better than everyone else. You say so yourself.

You will regret not voting.

j said...

less confused: well. his daughters are. but at least i get to live my dreams through them.

aek: mine is hanksi. which i'm sure is a word in Ikea.

dickophile: next post. you'll be thrilled.

anna: we are a backwards country.

toby: i don't think. i am. and i am not regretting it so far.