Saving All My Luck For You

"Caroline, the 32-year-old niece, who is agoraphobic and rarely leaves the house, quickly ran up $1,268 in charges on the Tribute card, shopping online for Christmas and birthday gifts. Of her newest [credit] card, Rose says: "I regret this one. Truly, I do."

Buried amidst ungodly lengthy marketing readings about unethical credit lending practices, this story puts a smile on my face. I want to direct a movie centered around this one powerful scene. I would cast Lindsay Lohan as Caroline and Sissy Spacek as Rose. This is yet another distraction keeping me from studying for my 7 exams.

And for this week, my mood is at a constant low. I do not get accepted for the RA job which would have guaranteed me free housing and free food. In essence, the school would be paying me $3000 to attend because there would be nothing for my scholarships to cover. I could've used that money to finance the movie. But that dream is dead. I decide to make an inventory of all the dreams that were shot dead in their tracks - post high school.

Biology research position - no
Genetics TA position - no
Admissions office position - no
Business school scholarship - no
Newspaper columnist position - no
GEMS100 teaching position - no
GEMS102 teaching position - no
Restaurant job - no
RA job - no

I'm applying to the architecture program in February. My entire college life so far has led up to this one moment. If they turn me down, I don't think I'll have any faith left in myself. But I have this theory that these consecutive rejections and this "bad-luck" just means I'm getting it out of my system. All of my good luck will come at once in a massive wave of acceptances, cash, and muscular men.

So my advice to myself, and perhaps Rose too, is to give things time. Everything tends to work out in the end. And if it doesn't, I'll just throw myself into the Anacostia.