Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Puppy Love

On Monday, while mowing the lawn, the hot neighbor decides to let his brand new puppy out to play and pee. The puppy runs into my yard and I turn off the lawn mower to make sure I don't mow it down accidentally and leave puppy parts all over the place. The hot neighbor spends a good 5 minutes running in circles trying to catch his puppy. I just stand there awkwardly and watch him get increasingly flustered and embarassed. His puppy runs toward me and starts licking my butt. I would rather have the hot neighbor licking my butt.

He grabs the puppy by the collar, gives him a spank, and drags him back to his side of the yard. I would rather have him do those things to me. He forces the puppy inside, only to emerge a few minutes later with a short leash. A leash that I could find a few other uses for.

The neighbor says, "sorry" without ever looking me in my eyes, which I have kept cooly concealed behind a pair of sunglasses. I say, "no problem" without ever revealing the lust in my heart. That is all we say to each other. And the cliche first meeting is over.

8 comments:

j.hubbard said...

atleast it wasn't an awkward firt meeting. and now you have something to talk to him about the next time. his dog.

Aek said...

Aww, that's cute. Puppies know things. ;-)

David said...

hey you never know. he could be playing it cool and maybe letting the puppy out was a test. you didn't say anything or pet his puppy?

haha... pet his puppy... well you know what i mean.

Oldyeller said...

Yeah, the puppy would have been the perfect way to start up a conversation, asking to pet him, saying you wish you could have one but competing on the ATP tour and keeping incredibly fit take up all your time.......

Doug said...

hehehe, i love the ongoing stories about your hot neighbor. :)

Anna said...

can you take a photo of your hot neighbour and show us?

j said...

anna: knowing my luck another one of my readers probably went on an israel birthright trip with him...

Anna said...

LOL bummer